Do you ever have to convince yourself to do something you know you love?
I do. It’s embarrassing to admit how much coaxing it takes to get me outside sometimes. Occasionally, I have good reasons, but too often I let myself watch cat videos on the internet for hours, or sleep until the bright morning fades, rather than pull on a pair of boots and open the front door.
It almost happened again this weekend. I just got home Sunday afternoon from a trip to Thailand*. After a day of plane travel, and an overnight stay at Hotel Spare Bedroom because the snow-buried roads on Long Island were impassible, staying still seemed like the best idea I’d ever had. That first big snowfall, possibly our last, lay fresh and deep. Instead of a beckoning invitation, I imagined what 30 inch snowdrifts would do to my tired legs, compared to the luxury of my warm, dry apartment. But rain was forecast to wash it all away Monday, and I love good snow more than just about any other weather. Stay or go?
My better angels won out in the end. From my window, I watched the warm 3 o’clock sun cast long blue tree shadows across the snow banks. Sometimes, good light works the charm. I pulled on my snow boots. Better to hike hard for the last hours of daylight than to spend the year holding a grudge against my lazy bones.
Once I stepped out of my car, the fresh air and sunshine obliterated my jet lag. The snow was deep and powdery, but snow shoers, cross country skiers, and a rebel four-wheeler had broken the trail earlier in the day. Snow clung to the tree trunks, hung on the bark by the blizzard winds, and shouts and giggles from the sledding hills rang through the woods. My heart was glad I’d come.
My ears must have still been full of Bangkok traffic and roaring plane engines though, because it took a while for another sound to register over the swish and crunch of my snowsuit. A low, throaty note cut through the noise in my head like the bass pipes of an organ. And then it repeated itself, a familiar, musical phrase I’d grown up with, but never heard in the woods.
Hoo. Hoo. Hoo-hoo.
Great-horned owls are hard to find on Long Island. I know they’re here, but their territories are so large (tens of square miles), and their camouflage so perfect, that the odds on spotting one on any given outing are small. It’s luck, plus being at the right place at the right time, plus being out often enough to beat the poor odds. I got very lucky. It’s courtship season in owl world, and this owl was making herself known.
The sun was setting, and it took a long time, and many hoots, for me to triangulate her stand of pine trees, and then the individual tree, and finally her perch. But there she was, blinking her yellow eyes, posing in a sunbeam.
I wasn’t carrying the right lens to get a good picture, but through my more-powerful binoculars, I watched her lean into her hoots like a fog buoy into the swell, stretch her wings, ruffle her powder-soft feathers, and then flap gently to another tree. From a new branch, she broadcast her invitation to the woods again, and this time, another owl answered.
Time and again, I end up talking myself into staying put, even though I never, ever, ever regret going out. I have a collection of memories that should guarantee I never miss a chance, times when I almost didn’t go out, but did, and was amazed – the afternoon I ran past a huge black racer snake; the morning I watched the sun rise; the evening I found the hoot owl. Too often, my inertia overcomes my ambition, and it’s time I change that.
How about you, Dear Reader? Do you ever procrastinate doing things you love? Do you have any tips that help you beat the apathy? I need all the help I can get digging my butt out of this nice, comfy couch.
* Thailand recap and photos coming soon, I hope. There’s a lot to process!
“Too often, my inertia overcomes my ambition, and it’s time I change that.”
This is a constant struggle for me. Too often the idea of doing something is so big that I end up pushing it to the back of my mind and doing nothing. It’s really a mind trick though. The things are rarely as large as I imagine them to be. I promised myself I’d go on more hikes this year, and yet, I’ve only been on two. This is a good reminder to me to get out there.
Yes. The short answer is YES. Too often. I wish that it weren’t so.
Even this weekend it happened. A little cold, not too sunny. Zoe and I were getting cabin fever but the thought of putting my snow gear and her snow gear on to only go out for a short time paralyzed me for far too long. Then we did it and I am always so glad we do.
Can’t wait to hear about Thailand. I went in 2001, seems like so long ago.
Every time. Every time. It’s ridiculous, but there it is.
Thailand! I’m jealous and can’t wait to hear, of course, and see the photos beyond the Instagram shots I saw.
Huge black racer snake??? You were wearing heavy leather knee high boots, right? Of course, the rest is awesome.
Running shoes and shorts
I’ll join the chorus of echoes of people who get stuck in the inertia. Trying to wade out of it….slowly, ever so slowly!
YES I have to convince myself to do things I know I love all the time … reading is the first one that comes to mind. As soon as I get over the hump of that first page, it flies by … but a lot of time can go by until I’m ready to pick it back up again.
I don’t know, lady, don’t beat yourself up … at home in Chicago, when it got really snowy … I had a hard time wanting to go outside too … there’s all the prep of boots, jacket, scarf, gloves, pants … you need pants. So I think it might just be temporary with the weather … what do you think?
It might be temporary (also, in summer the heat, blech)! But I come up with other excuses too. Like, “Let’s watch Buttercup the Goat five more times before I leave! Oh, darn. It’s dark now…” I want to remember I have all these good memories in my pocket as encouragement to go Right Now, instead of waiting until it’s too late, no matter how awesome my warm, cozy bed feels.
What a day to read this post: we’ve had a virus visit us, and reading your post made me realize that I’ve changed out of pj’s and left the house… once… in a week. Whoa.
Snow is what draws us outside any day that’s above 20F. Love our baby sled. Yet there hasn’t been much snow in Chicago.
Any suggestions for prepping kids? At almost 3, A. is a pro at everything, except starting that darn zipper – and she likes to be recognized for each. stage. of. the. process. At almost 1, E. starts full body wiggles at the sight of his hat. Oh no! Must escape!
Jenny, you’re telling me little kids don’t just automatically jump into their snow gear thrilled to go play? Shoot, I think I’m screwed then, because I’ve got nothing
THIS. All the time. This is a big goal for me this spring, and it’s slow getting started. A lot of it for me is the seasonal depression that makes it so much harder to go out and look around, even though I KNOW going out will help. I’m working on it. Reading about you doing it, and being reminded how worth it it is definitely helps.